Friday, October 14, 2011

I'm so lonely.
I'm trying to think what I contribute with my life.
And can't think of a single difference I make.
Can't think of a single person I affect.
Can't think of a single person who can't go a week without missing me even a little.


I hate my fucking life,
I feel so alone.


Why do I do everything wrong.
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5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'd call writing a book a contribution, Sambo.
How's that going?

November 22, 2011 at 1:36 AM
Anonymous said...

A flashback:

"Now, my most treasured possession and prized creation would have to be my book. I'm not going to tell you what it's called, or even what it's about (sorry), but maybe you'll be able to read it someday yourselves. I've been writing it for five years, since I was nine years old, so it's getting to be pretty long. I think I've worked it out to having more words than the second Harry Potter book, so far. But of course, it's not as good, lol. "Quality over quantity", yeah, yeah.

============================

In fact, I'm planning to have two jobs. Ambitious much? Lol, just kidding. I have two things that I'm really passionate about, and I don't want to throw either away for the other.
I've probably already mentioned this, but for five years, I've wanted to be an author. And seeing as how you don't really need any qualifications to write a book, I set myself another standard- you know, to keep me motivated at school. So I decided to aim for Veterinary Science. I love animals to death, and helping them would really make me feel like I'm doing something important.
Some of my friends have suggested me writing books about the animals I help- kinda like Dr Harry!
Okay, now I'm getting TOO ambitious, lol.

But I just felt like telling you guys a bit about where I want to go in life. So what about you? If you're still in school, what do you want to be? If you're at university, what are you studying to be?

And don't say, "I know it's stupid, but..." because dreams and goals are never stupid. :)

They're the things we aim for in life, for one reason or another, and they're important to us. Things that are important to you are never stupid.

Just felt like adding that bit of philosophy!

===============================


Okay, I've decided something. I'm going to put a little, tiny, completely irrelevant section of my book here; and if you like, feedback would be great. I only wrote it two days ago, so I haven't had too much time to edit it.

Don't count on getting more. :)

Pain encompassed his body like fire; it was as if he was being tortured. The sleep that he had been hoping would be peaceful turned out to be painful and horrific. He cringed and cursed under his breath, and the darkness folded over him, refusing to let go.
A cackle surrounded him in the darkness, and Jack drew breath quickly, turning in all directions to catch a glimpse of his captor. He felt isolated and imprisoned in his gloomy dark room, wherever he was. He didn’t remember that in reality, he was in the hospital. Only vaguely did he know his own name.
He continued to turn—spinning, whirring—and suddenly the room was full of bright colours and shining lights. He squinted, still not being able to identify the source of laughter. A long, high-pitched ringing sound entered his ears, and Jack closed his eyes tightly, willing it to leave his head. The cackling had stopped.
“Jack…” a gravely voice breathed from afar, but it sounded to Jack as if they were talking over his very shoulder. Jack shrugged his shoulders up high and kept them there protectively. He cradled his hands in each other and whispered prayers to an unknown saviour. Jack was afraid.



And so yeah, that's all I'm going to give you. :)

You can't tell anything about the plot, and you only know one name, so it's okay. I hope it wasn't too amateur or horrible for anyone to read.


(cont. below)

November 22, 2011 at 3:09 AM
Anonymous said...

==================

Writing an entire book, I know, can get really boring. I've tried--and failed--to write heaps of them. The book I'm focused on now, strangely, was the first idea I ever came up with when I thought of a story to tell. I guess I just feel that after so long, I can't abandon it. In the first few years, though, I'd go months without writing anything for it. The trick is to make it interesting for you, as well. When you get to an exciting part of the book, it's like when you're reading it--you can't stop! Kinda addictive, I guess.
Maybe that's just me, but it's what I've found. xP


==================

I know that sometimes I'll post twice a day, but to be honest, I have to restrain myself most of the time from posting more than that. Lol, I'm totally addicted, and I love this. xP

Okay, the last time I wrote was about... eight or nine hours ago. Oh well.

Today is the first day of Spring. :) Yaaay! Spring is my favourite season of the year. It's starting to get warmer, and today just felt happier.

=================

And since then... I've been writing. I'm almost at the end of my book, which is kind of exciting for me... but sad, as well. It won't be much, though, because I'm re-writing the whole first half of it, lol! And when I'm finished editing (after a long, long, LONG time...) I'm going to have to think about publishers. I'm not too sure if I'm ever going to get up the guts and send it to someone. If they turned it down... urgh. Publishing this book is my goal in life, believe it or not, and I think it would destroy me if someone told me that it's not good enough. :S

I know it probably won't be (my aunty told me that around ninety-nine percent of books sent to publishers are turned down) but I don't really want to be told that it isn't. Oh well.

=================

If you don't care, good for you.

But I care. And so I'm blogging it.

I have finished my book. :) Officially.

And now... to rewrite the whole first half. Lol!

It should only take me a few days. And then... I'll be DONE!

:D

*Extremely happy*

PEACE!

~Sam

===================

Andddd... I'm going to go and look at publisher-website-things now. xP

================

On a lighter subject, I emailed two publishers, and they replied. They both accept unsolicited manuscripts (meaning that I can send my book in without having to get an agent or lawyer), so I'll probably work on the letter and stuff to them over the next week or so, and send it over the holidays. Not the whole book, though, just a few chapters.

==================

(Replying to commets.)
Christine: Hi there! Hah, I've been writing here a lot recently... I'm lonely with my book finished, ;( LOL.

=======================

My book is... well, I don't think it's done being edited, buuuuut... I'm sort of sick of it at the moment. I gave it to my dad to read, so I guess I'll wait to see what he has to say about it. At the moment I'm trying to think of ideas for new books. :Z Gahhh... I sure hope it doesn't take me another five years.

====================

(cont. below)

November 22, 2011 at 3:10 AM
Anonymous said...

LOL, ah, I didn't have the guts to give it to my dad, he asked. And then I spent about an hour with the USB going, "Nooooo, you can't, you're not allowed to!" Buuut eventually I gave in. I need someone to read it, other than my ten year old sister.
Uhm, well, IF I send it to a couple of publishers, it'll take about four months for them to get back to me, if they actually do. And that's to tell me, most likely, that it's been rejected. And then, IF it gets accepted, it takes about a year to be edited and printed... sigh. Yes, I've researched, and no, I'm not too excited about having to wait four months to be told it ain't gonna happen. :l

===================

And for some reason I remember an old question that you asked me... about my family's published books. Well... last year my Pa published a REALLY big medical dictionary, it's huge. And pretty popular too. But I can't tell you the name of it.
And my Nana has published a book too, another medical one. And my aunt has a pHd (or however you write it) in something, I forget what, and SHE published a non-fiction book last year too. :] Anddd... did you know, I'm related to Charles Dickens? Did ya? Huh? Hahaha. Remembered that randomly."

All your words. All about your book. Hope you feel inspired and contribute-y.

Also, I think about you often. And I come to check up on you. You'll always be my favorite and most talented blogger.

(The End.)

November 22, 2011 at 3:11 AM
Sam said...

I miss you.
I wish I could check up on you, too.

It means a lot that you went through all that effort to make me feel better. Thank you.

I have been trying to convince myself to start writing again ... think that was the push I really needed.

Good to hear from you, old friend.

Sam

February 1, 2012 at 3:40 AM

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