The world doesn't revolve around YOU.

Guys, please please please forgive me. Four days, I know. I just... have NOT been in a writing mood lately. Which concerns me, because writing is my deepest passion and without it I feel like an empty shell of a person.

Anyway.

Well, I've been pretty miserable. May's sunk to a new low, and I've been trying to avoid school as best I can. I didn't go on Friday, the day we were selling those ice cup things-- which, by the way, I didn't make-- and I want to clear something up. Making frozen things at home and selling them at school is not a genius plan. You can tell that easily, right? Because I live a half hour's drive from my school, and it's almost Summer. So can you guess whose idea it was?

....


If you guessed May, you'd be right. She's a smart one, isn't she? Conveniently, she didn't have to make them.

So when I didn't go on Friday, May says to K:

May: Isn't Sam here?
K: I don't think so...
May: GOD! She was supposed to bring the ice cups, eski, cookie mix, signs... (etc) She's letting the whole team down!

Okay, first of all. May is the fundraiser-person for our project, May elected that we sell food, May told everyone she'd make and bring the signs, and I didn't hear ANYTHING about a friggin' eski!

Blah. :[

Although I don't regret not going on Friday, cause later that day I remembered that it had been May's birthday. PHEW. That would've been total hell.

Oh, and she said something else after all that to K... but, I don't want to repeat it. It's not obscene or anything... I just, well, it hurt me... a lot. It really did. K told me and I was so close to crying... it was embarrassing. The problem with fighting with one of your ex best friends is that chances are you've confided in them previously, whether it be your crush, or greatest insecurities. Unfortunately, I told her both, but for now, at least Josh has been left out of the picture.

I can't believe she'd sink that low.

And then today,

May: Are you still talking to Sam?
K: Yep.
May: Ohhh, that sucks...

Sigh...

I am this close to giving up. Truly, giving up. And I don't know what consequences may follow, I just know that I can't take this anymore.

Thankfully, Simone was away today, so I didn't have to deal with the whole situation with her... y'know, how she talks to me in ONE class, and ignores me in the rest? I'm contemplating talking to her about it. Well, contemplating... hoping I can get the guts to... they're basically the same thing in this case.

And... Ellie wants me to punch May. Which isn't surprising, knowing Ellie. But then she and Sarah went home early today after going to the creek in Science and touching some random plant and they both got huge rashes up their arms. So it was just me, Jess, and... uh oh, I've forgotten her fake name. Hold on. Okay, Rya. Haven't talked about her much, if at all! Hehehe.

So... we were watching Jess eat, and that was hilarious, cause she kept choking (she was laughing hysterically and still shovelling food into her mouth) and rocking back and forth and then she slammed her head into a pole. Hahaha... it was truly funny. She didn't get hurt or anything, so I can say that without being mean. Riiiight...?

Anyway... I'm totally self-conscious about the way I look right now, thanks to May, and what she said. I'm not telling you guys, but it WAS about how I looked. And now I'm just staring at that picture of me on this blog and contemplating taking it down... I look at it and see ew. Don't you?

Well... yeah, can't answer comments now, have to feed the dog. I swear I'll post tomorrow!!!

Peace!

<3 <3 <3

~Sammy